The Secret To Building Self Confidence

The Secret To Building Self Confidence


Do you feel confident? In your body? In your relationships? In front of your peers, family, and out in the world?

Do you go for the things you want, start conversations, put yourself out there, and take risks? 

In my experience, building self confidence is one of the top three things everyone wants to improve.

Money and relationships are the other two major pieces of the pie that come up for most people. I’ll cut straight to the point today and tell you the secret to building confidence.

  • Confidence comes from within.
  • Confidence comes from what you tell yourself. 
  • Positive, self-loving, and truthful self-talk is the key. 

Confidence does NOT come from what others think about you or what others tell you.

It doesn’t come from what your boyfriend, husband, wife, mom, brother, sister, or uncle thinks about you.

It doesn’t come from a 5-star review or positive feedback from your boss and peers.

It doesn’t come losing 20 pounds, a flashy new car, a new iPhone, or a bigger job title.

It doesn’t come from a degree from a fancy school or 20k more a year. 

Yes, the above-mentioned things can help solidify and build self confidence in yourself; however true confidence – or the lack of it – comes from the inner self talk you engage in on a regular basis. 

I am a big fan of retail therapy and love a fresh new pair of sneakers and lipstick to feel sparkly for a moment.

But that’s the thing – it only lasts for a moment.

Lasting confidence that is embedded in your psyche and embodied in the core of who you are comes from you. It comes from what you believe about yourself.

I’m not talking about fake it till you make it self talk. Waking up every morning and saying something like “I’m the smartest person in the world” or “I’m the best person on my team” when you have absolutely nothing to back that up isn’t going to work. 

Positive, self-loving and truthful self-talk is the key.

Learn how to build self confidence with this simple exercise: 

Open your journal and start to write out a list of all the positive, self-loving things that you know are TRUE about yourself. Here are some examples from my personal vault:

  • I am a real healer and show up every day in service.
  • I am dedicated to my students and clients.
  • I try my best every day. 
  • I trust myself and follow my heart.
  • I have everything I need.
  • I have a thriving community that believes in me. 

Ahhh… I felt my left eye swell a baby tear as I wrote those out. 🙂

My heartfelt a dose of love and gratitude as I finished writing that last statement… and that transforms into confidence in myself and my life. 

Try it today. Take 5 minutes to write a list. Practice makes progress.

If building self confidence is something you need help with, apply today to see if one of my coaching programs are a good fit for you.

Learn what is self care and why is it important.